Seemingly Insignificant Decisions

All decisions may seem relatively unimportant in isolation, but a pattern adds up to this – selling myself short.  I am learning to change my perspective by slight degrees. I used to think I needed to spin my life dial 360 degrees or to use the over-used advice – “change direction 180 degrees”, however, it has dawned on me that slight, gentle fine-tuning of my direction, by taking my life’s compass and gently turning the dial one little notch to the left or right and changing my slow but steady plotted course on a very slight trajectory of hope and gratefulness, I will happen across better intersecting paths and greater duties of inspiration for myself. 

I have had the delightful and painful realization that my small decisions have led me to where I am right now: divorced and single, building a business alone.  You and I make choices all the time. We choose what to do from one moment to another. Often, these choices have consequences—either obvious or not.

~Every decision, large or small, brings consequences.

~Give an encouraging word to those I want in my life.

~Stop.  Listen.  Learn something new about someone.

What is my intention? How does my direction and choice affect my life in the future; the next ten minutes, hours, days, weeks and even into my future years.  Please be mindful of the choices made.  Often, the answer is that I’m fairly mindless. Perhaps it is because I am striving so hard to be appreciated and recognized as a valuable woman that is not to say I’m careless or ignorant (though that can happen), but, rather I am over HOPEFUL.  I tend to be eager to please others.  I simply do not see the weight of consequences attached to seemingly insignificant decisions.  Such as going out on a date with an unavailable man; he is working full time and developing his own companies and says he wants to see me, but fails to schedule dates.  Swapping daily texts with a man only offering generic one-liners – “hey, thinking of you” verses sharing actual news of his day. 

How can I approach living a more full life that approximates my vision for how I want to live? How can I make more mindful choices to create joy in my personal life?

~Work to become more mindful in my choices, no matter how insignificant the choice may be.

~Do the right thing – even when no one is watching.

I’ve been creating a life plan: first of all, who I want to be, where I want to go, what I’d like my life to become.  Specifically I have realized I desire to find a suitable life partner, a man I desire for emotional, physical and economic intimacy.  It has been over ten years since my domestic abusive marriage dissolved and I have healed myself.  I desire to truly share all myself with a companion who loves and values all of my life force – my wacky energy, my intense passion and creative endeavors in business, basic domesticity and future economic projects.

The result—when I make a decision according to my goals, I make a mindful choice. “Am I going to do this? Will this get me closer or farther from my goal?”  “Is this ‘dater’ truly available to create and share companionship with me?

Truth is, many folks, yes – I’m speaking to you, we all know what they should do and go ahead and make the opposite decision, but, if I am truly able to break that habit and make better decisions, I’ll progress toward my goals rather than away from them.  A tiny change of direction will aid me in building a more significant life path walking next to a man who supports and loves me, all of me, while creating joy with others.

~Know the goal or vision of where you want to be in your life.

   ~Align choices to reach goal.

   ~If you slip off the horse, get back on and keep working at it.

   ~Never, ever, give up - only slightly change direction and proceed with joy.